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AuthorTopic: Cog's Rants, Week 2 (Read 361 times)
Cog
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Cog's Rants, Week 2
« Thread Started on Nov 11, 2007, 8:29pm »		[Quote]
Alright, first off, I wish to apologize for the total lack of updating. I've been away from my computer quite often and really haven't had the chance, (or will), to get on.

But now without further or do, I bring about my next topic of my displeasure: Dragons. Omnipotent Overlords, or Dependant Pets?

Now don't get me wrong. Dragons are mighty creatures indeed and only the foolish would underestimate them. Hell, many creatures would rather run in fear than face one, and in which case, if your running you don't have to be faster than the dragon, just the paladin.

But I digress.

Why is it that something so big, so powerful, so awe inspiring and terrifying, be so stupid. Sure, I know what your thinking. "Cog! Dragons are the smartest creatures in the realms."

Well that me be so my faithful viewers, but it doesn't mean they are smart where it counts. Sure, wizards with a high enough intelligence (*Cough Pattersmith Cough*) could sit for weeks discussing with them, but thats just the crux of it. They need company.

Book will say that dragons are fiercely territorial despite their alignment and ways of living. *Gestures to the Dragonomicon and assorted Monster Manuals* They will track down intruders and eat them or at least force them away, except possibly copper dragons or bronze dragons.... but their methods alone will make you want to leave just the same.

Dragons, despite their great and terrible power, are little more than puppies. Sure, people usually aren't torn apart or melted by fire when being attacked by dogs, but the point still stands.

My first point to this is their hoard.

What kind of hoard would a dragon have if it weren't for us mortals crafting items of value, stamping out gold and platinum coins, forging magical swords and armors, working lumps of stone into beautiful gems? Simple, they wouldn't. Everybody knows dragons need a hoard to sustain their lives and if weren't for us, all dragons would be dead by now.

My second point is the myths surrounding them. Go and slay the great and terrible dragon, rescue the fair maiden, and become a legendary hero. Horsepucky, I say!

It is entirely probably that the whole "Slay + dragon = win princess" equation was made my the lazy bastards themselves! They needed a way to keep a steady supply of treasure and crunchy wannabe heroes marching to their doorsteps without having to go out and look for them.

Again, you may be second guessing me and thinking, "But what about when evil dragons go on rampages?"

Simple, their bored. A dragon is a giant, super intelligent lizard that sleeps most of it's life in a cave somewhere. On the occasions that the damned things actually wake up, what are they supposed to do? Intelligent creatures are to frightened to speak with them, they eat anything else, and honestly, have you ever seen a dragon trying to play with Leggos? As humorous as that thought is, I don't see it happening!

Now before I continue ranting to the point I get redunent, I give you all the chance to offer your thoughts.

Feedback.... NOW!
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Keep talking. Maybe eventually you'll say something to reverse all the other stuff you just said.
Crisis
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Re: Cog's Rants, Week 2
« Reply #1 on Nov 12, 2007, 12:49am »		[Quote]
Since this is a PG 13 board I will keep my opinions concerning dragons/virgins and the eating thereof quiet. As for the slay the dragon win the princess, personally I suspect thast it was thought up by kings who were tired of idiots who believed all those fairy tales of young earnest poor men who win the heart and half the kingdom merely by showing up at the right place at the right time. How many princesses have been awakened in the middle of the night by some strange man in their boudoir claiming they woke her from a curse with a kiss? The proof being the whole castle was asleep. (Who wouldn't be at 2:00 AM?). No my fiend or friend, THAT ruse was thought up by irate fathers who were awakened by screams from their daughter's rooms and the sound of some farmboy being struck repeatedly by shoes thrown at him. It is MUCH easier on everyone's nerves to know if you want the kingdom you have to slay the dragon. It keeps the dragon from maurading and stealing cattle and keeps the boys down on the farm.

Now as for treasure. Just who do you mean when you say we? The dwarves, the demons, the humans, the elves? *shudder* It seems to me that dragons are more over grown magpies than puppies. They like shiney things. They swoop down and take bright sparkly stuff. Quartz, diamonds, gold or pyrite they are all the same to the eye of a dragon. It is the fact WE place value upon certain things that the dragon hoards it. As you stated. They are bored, they like challenges. If clamshells with mother of pearl were the units of value, dargons would hoard them. Why? to draw something that MIGHT be intelligent enough to speak to it to it's cavern.

Now the rampages I have to agree with you. Although I suspect there may be other reasons in addition to the amusement of watching small beings run around much like a roc with its head chomped off. Face it mortals are smelly noisy neighbors. Plus they have lots of food like sheep, cattle, children. Why not have a night on the town?

In other words. Dragons are not pets, they are a nuisance.
« Last Edit: Nov 12, 2007, 12:49am by Crisis »Link to Post - Back to Top  IP: Logged
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Re: Cog's Rants, Week 2
« Reply #2 on Apr 27, 2008, 7:56am »		[Quote]
Dragons are indeed powerful creatures but they simply have not yet learned thier place in the true order of things... to be powerful servants to greater creatures.. such as the people of Graycastle!
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